Tips for Talking to Children About School Threats
Reassure Children that they are safe
Emphasize that schools are very safe
Validate their feelings and explain that all feelings are OK
Let children talk about their feelings and help them put these feelings into perspective
Assist children in expressing these feelings appropriately
Make time to talk
Let your child's questions be your guide as to how much information to provide
Be patient. Children do not always talk about their feelings readily
Watch for clues that your child may want to talk, such as hovering around while you work on a chore or task
Some children prefer writing, playing music or doing an art project as an outlet
Young children may need concrete activities (drawing, looking at picture books or imaginative play) to help express their feelings
Keep your explanations developmentally appropriate
Elementary School
Elementary school children need brief and simple information. Be sure to reinforce that their school and homes are safe and that adults are there to protect them. Give simple examples of school safety:
School doors are locked
Adults are present to monitor them on the playground
They have practiced emergency drills during school
Intermediate School
Expect that Intermediate school children will be more vocal in asking questions about whether they believe they are safe. They may need help in separating reality from fantasy. Discuss efforts of their school and community leaders to provide safe schools:
Regular drills
School doors are locked
Adults are present to monitor them on the playground
Middle and High School
Middle and high school students will have strong and varying opinions about the cause of threats of violence in school and society. They will share suggestions about how to make school safer and how to avoid tragedy. Emphasize the role that they have in maintaining safe schools:
Do not provide building access to strangers
Report strangers on campus
Report threats to school safety made by students or others
Communicate personal safety concerns to school administrators
Access support (or encourage others to do so) for emotional needs
Observe your child's emotions
Some children may not express their concerns verbally. Changes in behavior, appetite and sleep patterns can also indicate a child's level of anxiety or discomfort. In most children, these symptoms will ease with reassurance and time. Some children may be at risk for more intense reactions. Children who have had a past traumatic experience or personal loss, suffer from depression or other mental illness, or with special needs may be at greater risk for severe reactions than others. Seek the help of mental health professionals if you are concerned.
Limit television viewing of these events
Limit television viewing and be aware if the television is on in a common area. Developmentally inappropriate information can cause anxiety or confusion, particularly in young children. Adults also need to be mindful of the content of conversations that they have with each other in front of children, even teenagers, and limit their exposure to vengeful, hateful and angry comments that might be misunderstood.
Maintain a normal routine
Keeping a regular schedule can be reassuring and promote physical health. Ensure that children get plenty of sleep, regular meals and exercise. Encourage them to keep up with their schoolwork and extracurricular activities. Don't push too hard if they seem overwhelmed.